Death by Caffeine Comments
Well as soon as I posted that last thing about “being heavily linked,” a few people pointed out that I’m also linked on the AOL home page. With 137 comments on the page, the load is just too high… so if you have any comments on it, post them here!
461 Comments
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How the hell is 3×3 or 3×4 either metric or imperial. That is simple math, not a unit of measurement.
Just wanted to point out that in some of these cases you would never make it to the limit. Red Bull and several others have an ingredient called inositol (niacin) in 100% RDA quanities. niacin is one of the B family vitamins and acts on the body by opening capillaries and blood vessels (good cure for bloodshot eyes) too much niacin at one time can cause you problems like flushing, itching and sharp drops in blood pressure. I’m not sure what the leathal dose is or if there is one I just know too much niacin and you start to feel really really bad. The up side is that in moderation higher than RDA doses will lower your bad cholesterol counts.
dumas, you mean you only have 3 shirts? what’s that got to do with English measurements?
Dumas, you are confusing base ten with metric.
I’m so sad the comments have stopped
all you little monkey people need to go back to amusing me now
post more gibberish please
some frappes maybe for choices?
Here’s the deal with us Americans.
We don’t see ourselves as superior to the Europeans or the rest of the world.
We just really don’t care what you guys do or think. Nothing personal. We’re mainly concerned with American and what affects us. That’s why we don’t care about soccer. That would involve a bunch of non-American teams and, as I said earlier, we don’t care.
Maybe we’ll kick a little aid your way if a giant tsunami kicks your ass or something, but that’s about it.
We’ll do what we want to do. Vote who we want to vote for. Eat what we want to eat. Go where we want to go. And we’ll measure in inches, feet, pounds and ounces if we feel like it.
You don’t have to like it. Once again, WE DON’T CARE.
And if you’ve got a problem, you can lick our big American balls.
Peace everybody.
Unlike most Americans I like Europe. In fact I’ve been to several different European countries and to help my fellow Americans understand our friends across the pond let’s dispel some myths and set some stories straight.
 Europeans don’t bathe. True in some places, i.e. most of Europe, but not always true. The smell could just be the goat’s ass they ate for lunch. Scandinavians bathe all the time, what else are they going to do? The English for some reason are nuts about bathing their feet. Why I don’t know.
ï‚· Europeans have a different word for everything. False. If it was invented in the last 120 years or is useful to any hominid that walks on two legs the word will usually be the same as ours. They may say it all funny – but they just do that to be difficult. Think of Inspector Clouseau asking to use a “phoenneâ€.
ï‚· They have a proud heritage and ancient traditions. True and false, depends. In Greece they are very proud of Periclean Athens but are ashamed to have been ruled by the Turk for almost 400 years, which represents the last time they had an effective government. In truth by now most Greek culture is Turkish, but don’t point that out to them it pisses them of like you wouldn’t believe. In France everyone you talk to had parents or grandparents who were in the “resistanceâ€. I think the only thing the French ever resisted was hygiene and political restraint. Most collaborated with the Nazis so feverently their lips still conform to Nazi rectums. Vichy bastards. Make no mistake the only Europeans who were on the right side during WWII were the Brits, Poles and sometime the Italians when they tried to “help†the Germans. Having the Italian Army on your side during a shooting war is like seeing Hillary Clinton naked – it’s not often done and for good reason.
 British food is horrible. Not true. You can find good East Indian food almost everywhere in Britain. Actual British food for the most part can not be eaten unless there is a money wager involved. Yorkshire Pudding is NOT pudding but Blood Sausage is exactly that – you have been warned. With that said there are more Five Star restaurants in London than Paris if eating pancreas and God knows what else is your thing. The Brits are among the best foreigners you will meet mostly because they speak English and because they are polite, maybe too polite judging by recent events. British Policeman, aka Bobbies look harmless enough because they don’t carry guns but don’t screw with them. I think there is a lot of paperwork herein the U.S. if a cop shoots somebody but the Bobbies don’t have to fill out shit if they pound the crap out of you with their billy clubs. Ask yourself this question; who were we limiting with our Bill of Rights? If you see Tinkers in Britain or Ireland stay away from them, they’re no damn good. The same is true of Albanians in Greece, Gypsies in Eastern Europe, and Arabs in France.
 The British have bad teeth. True. But so do the Irish and everyone in Eastern Europe and the former Soviet Union. Germans have nice teeth but they rarely smile and when they do you should be very concerned particularly if you are Jewish, Catholic, Roma, a trade unionist or gay. I’ve come to believe that tea-drinking cultures have really bad teeth.
 The women in Spain are the best looking in Europe. True. Look at them while you can because their Salafi – Wahhabi masters will have them all wearing burkas before too long. There was a time when less then a hundred Spanish soldiers conquered one of the largest and most blood thirsty and repressive empires in human history.
 The only thing on time in Spain are the BullFights. True. Be sure to drag that annoying PETA friend with you to the Corrida. Tell him/her that you saw the bull before in the countryside, sitting peacefully under a tree and he was crying. Give the bull a name too, something endearing. You might mention that the Matador beats his wife and kids too, just to see if you can goad the PETArd into intervening on behalf of the bull. I can tell you there are few things as amusing as watching 3000 drunken Spaniards beating the dog shit out of some English speaking PETArd. Oddly enough there is profound religious and cultural symbolism and prehistoric precedent in bullfighting, so the Spanish have little tolerance for the “Morrisey Meat is Murder†crowd.
Hello,
interesting page, but it is obvious that you cannot possibly commit a suicide by drinking to much caffeinated drinks. Unlike drinking alcohol to death, caffeine (C-A-F-F-E-I-N-E, get on with it, there’s E between F and I!) will certainly block your ability to drink before you get anywhere near death.
On the metric against imperial units topic:
The trouble with imperial units (inches, feet, yards, miles, oz, pounds etc.) is there are not constant ratios between the units. 1 ft is 12 inches, but 1 yard is only about 3 ft, and 1 mile, on the other hand, equals to something like 1600 yards (more or less).
With metric, you don’t have this problem:
1 gram x 1000 = 1 kilogram x 1000 = 1 ton …
Centi-meter – Meter – Kilo-meter …
In fact, it is pointless to argue about this, because this is more or less a political problem: How to explain to your fellow vassals (oh, sorry, I meant citizens!), that they have been “wrong” for the past 2 or 3 hundred years, and that they should switch to a different measuring system.
So, dear Americans who so valiantly protect world-wide peace by bulliing prisoners without being able to properly write “YOU ARE, YOUR, YOURS” etc. (oh, sorry, this wasn’t necessary) – keep calculating that 1 mile is 63818,897637795275590551181102362 inches. We, the idiotic rest of the world, will keep our “1 kilometer is 1 million milimeters) for ourselves. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
– Alcator
I don’t know if anyone else suggested it (didn’t feel like reading all the posts), but could you possibly add Guarana?
Alcator,
It would seem that following your premise you would want to mimic the US based on its superiority in so many categories- being the “oldest” in many cases simply means being the moldiest.
btw- It is a foolish mistake to mock others concerning their spelling errors and then in turn make them yourself.
“by drinking to much caffeinated drinks” should read: by drinking *too many* caffeinated drinks.
“bulliing” should read- bullying.
And the best one of all, “milimeters”, should read…well, since you are such a genius on which standard is superior and on spelling, you should be able to correct that one on your own.
Not sure which country you are writing from, but chances are very good that America, in its quest to bully the world, has saved your sorry smug country at least once. Maybe it was not in your lifetime, but that does not justify an ignorance of history.
I’m the smartest being in existence. I’m even smarter than all of you who commented. I’m so much smarter, in fact, that I don’t even have to prove my intelligence; I only have to say that it is so and it is so.
THE END
p.s. Whether measured in metric or imperial my brain weighs more than all of you, you mortals (Yes, I meant “all of you” not “all of yours”)
and im sure you expect us to believe that you’re God too. oh, and Alcator can shove it because his comment was too damn long and boring! fuck off, rest of the world! even though America has some dysfunctions and an awful president, it’s better than what youve got! mwuahahaha
xoSara
My previous comment got deleted for cursing soo i guess i have to type it over… =(
Alcator – get a life..everything that spellchecker said was absolutely right. your grammar mistakes made me mad. whatever country your from, im pretty sure America is better and the people in it are probably a lot smarter!And your comment was extremely boring, long, and pointless. Dont waste your time making yourself look dumb.
“God”- Oh, you’re funny.
xoSara
ok maybe it didnt…lol my bad!
Holy shit! I cannot believe that I read every one of those posts.
Very funny stuff.
Oh and Americans do think they are better than the rest of the world, and will continue to do so, until our civilization topples. Just like every great civilization before them.
I would just like to point out that it is not only Europe who use the metric system. All of us here in New Zealand use the ways of metric.
Just thought you all might like to know.
Nice oxymoronic use of American and civilisation !
And whilst on the subject, surely one indicator of a ‘great civilisation’ would be the continued and widespread use of its language.
I appreciate from reading the foregoing posts that many of your fellow citizens are doing their best to mangle English out of all recognition and to thereby, ultimately, establish a new form more suited to the intellectual capacity of its intended users.
Perhaps an appropriate name for this, once fully formed, might be Spanglish !
I await, with gleeful anticipation, numerous responses written in the finest examples of the above.
ps I think I’ll have another cup of tea now to top up my caffeine levels.
Kin,
“dumas, you mean you only have 3 shirts? what’s that got to do with English measurements?”
I was pointing out that with such small numbers, there is absolutely no advantage of using a metric system of measurement.
“Dumas, you are confusing base ten with metric.”
News flash: metric IS base ten. If it wasn’t, it would have no other advantage.
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Lets put an end to the metric/imperial arguement: Both have advantages. There is no doubt that the metric system is better in science and finance. For personal life, it’s a bit different since human body or nature as a whole don’t understand metric, and it has been argued that imperial system is more ‘natural.’ In fact, it’s only at the latest period of human evolution(past ~3000 years) when we even needed to count high numbers: People had for example 2 cows, 4 pigs, 3 shirts, 1 pair of shoes, etc., in which case, metric system is irrelevant. Even now, the imperial system has it’s advantages especially when dealing with small numbers. For example, if i baked some cookies, it makes sense to place the dough on the pan 3×3(9) or 3×4(12), than 5×2(10) or 10×1(10). If I buy something for $5.26, it makes more sense to use 2 coins instead of 8.