DECAFBAD
If you’ve been around the programming world (especially the C/C++ world), you get to see all kinds of funny things programmers put into their source code. Of course, it’s usually stuff that’s funny only to other programmers. For example, when programmers don’t really care what value goes into a variable, they will make up something funny. Since you can use 0-9 and A-F to express numbers in hexadecimal format, you can spell some things:
0xdeadbeef;
0xcafebabe;
0xbaadfeed;
0xbaadf00d;
0xc0edbabe;
You get the idea. There’s another one: 0xdecafbad. Decaf, as this number clearly says, is bad. Who’s going to argue with math?
For those idiots that wish to argue with math, science is here to back them up: The American Heart Association says Drinking decaffeinated coffee may be harmful to heart health.
They basically said that in the first-of-its-kind controlled study with caffeine (in which they controlled the subjects, the brewing, the beans, etc), decaf increased the production of apoliproprotein B — a fatty acid that attaches to LDL. The caffeine-drinking and non-coffee-drinking groups didn’t experience the same rise in levels.
There you have it, from a credible, scientific source, decaf is bad. You’ll be doing your body a favor to switch to regular caffeinated coffee. Or just don’t drink coffee. Decaf is an abomination against nature.
Note: Caffeine’s existence is just a theory, not a fact, regarding the increase in energy in humans. It’s existence should be approached with an open mind, studied carefully, and critically considered. Even though we don’t make you critically consider gravity, pollution, helio-centric models of the universe, or the existence of solar winds, all of which are just theories, we want to call this one out specifically. Even though we don’t teach you enough to read and write at a reasonable level, we’re sure you’ll be able to research, understand, digest, and synthesize postdoctorate-level writings on the subject, and come to your own conclusions.
5 Comments
I wholeheartedly agree that decaf is bad. 
Love it! VERY clever spoof of that crap the creationists are trying to get into public school textbooks. Keep it coming.
because IPv6 uses hex octets, it will allow for ISP’s to embed words like this into subnets and indevidual addresses.
I claim the first 16 bit hex sentence from way back in 1980: 0BAD FEED, DEAD BEEF.
Also, I participated in a caffeine study (~1988) and it may be the one cited. The interesting result is at the end but, read on for the details.
The study was done at Stanford but I don’t recall the sponsor. We drank 32 oz of regular brewed coffee (via their coffee and exacting brewing instructions) for a month. We had many blood tests with the samples going to Stanford’s medical center and to several other labs to see what the lab accuracy was (this is another whole topic by itself!).
The group (~150 folks) was then split into three subgroups and we went our separate ways: cold turkey, decaf, and keep on drinking brewed regular coffee. I was in the decaf group and we drank 32 oz of coffee per day as before but with decaf coffee supplied by the study and brewed just as carefully. Even I, whose taste buds were shot off in the war, could taste the difference with the first sip. Yuck!
Well, anyway, we drank coffee and got tapped as before with all the tests for another month. The result was a jump in the blood triglycerides of the decaf sub group.
Well, the funny part is the study decaf was solvent decaffeinated coffee which is not common anymore. So, the whole thing was for not much.
All I discovered is that I got a thumping good headache coming off of the caffeine. Also, since blood labs cholesterol numbers differ a lot given the same sample, one should not trust the cholesterol numbers your doctor tells you too much.
beautiful