Lightning Bolt
I could give you 3 guesses as to who has a new energy drink, and you would probably be right. Even Lost, the TV show, has its own energy drink. But you’d never guess this one:
Steven Segal.
Yes, the white ninja star of movies like Under Seige and Under Seige 2 brings us an energy drink full of ingredients from the orient. It’s a brew made with Tibetan Goji Berry, Asian Cordyceps, B Vitamins, Ginseng, Gingko Biloba, Yerba Mate, Green Tea Extract and Guarana. You’ll notice that there is no caffeine added, but guarana extracts are essentially caffeine, so there should be an energy kick. In addition, green tea extracts should provide some additional caffeine kick. Plus, who knows what the magical tibetan berry and that C-thing do. In fact, this thing is so freaking natural that they didn’t add any sugar to it. No, it has a cane juice concentrate called Polisweet. 100% juice for 100% power, as this reviewer noted:
October 26, 2005 Reviewer: K. Lauro “Goji Master”
This energy drink is out of this world. When I took my first sip i felt like I could take on 30 ninjas much like Steven Seagal himself. The Goji Berrys fueled my mind and soul and made me want to snap necks just like Steven Seagal would do to any villain.
As of this moment, there is no reason to not buy this drink.
It comes in two flavors, the aptly-named
Asian Experience
Also, here’s the least annoying site I found talking about Tibetan Goji Berries.
4 Comments
This drink sucks, it tastes like a cheap wine cooler and smells like ass. We bought a few because it said “100% Segal juice”… Besides many oppertunities for inside jokes, it’s a poor energy drink.
What a waste of funding, however little that thing got to develop it. I really don’t think drinks based off of white teevee nunjas was really a good idea in the first place, if you ask me. Take it from me, I’m half Japanese. (But “The Last Samurai” was pretty cool, and much more aptly made, and it was a movie, too.)
The Cordyceps are a type of mushroom. It is said (but I haven’t been able to confirm) that Tibetan mountain guides will not take you up Mount Everest unless you eat some. It is present in a few anti-ageing supliments as an energy booster, and can be bought elsewhere as a stand-alone supliment. Personally, I’ve used it for energy during workouts, and it does seem to have a positive effect on stamina. Naturally grown Cordyceps are grown off the heads of a certain type of catapiller (seriously), but you can get some that are labratory-grown on soybeans (what I use). I found that it also seems to partially ease the immediate headache you get from caffiene withdrawl (but I take some other odd herbal energy boosters which might also have an effect on that). Where can I buy it, except from online?
yeah, you should note that the energy drink “…lost” has nothing to do with the tv show, it’s name comes from the snowboarding company that spawned it.