Starbucks: Perfect Shot Gone Wrong
It’s about time for another anti-starbucks diatribe. Fanboys and girls – avert your gaze and cover your ears.
If you didn’t know – Starbucks has been experiencing a slowdown in sales. So much so that they are closing 7,100 stores nationwide (for just 3 hours) for retraining.
“We will have all new standards for how we create the drinks,” said spokeswoman Valerie O’Neil. “They will be trained in creating the perfect shot, steaming the milk and all the pieces that come together in a drink.” (source)
Maybe the shine is starting to come off. Maybe people are tired of having a Starbucks every 100 meters or so.
But anyway. About that perfect shot…
For the first time in about 18 months or so… I entered a Starbucks outlet. Reason: Meeting a friend for a late-nite coffee (yes I know… it’ll keep me awake…) In my small town – every other coffee joint was closed except for the ever-present ‘bucks.
Point taken: Starbucks have longer opening hours… and allow that caffeine-fix at all hours… however…
An espresso shot. That’s what I ordered – not a latte (aka coffee-flavored milk). I’m talking about the tiny cup with a few sips worth of caffeinated delight. Where you can taste the sweet caramel overtones, where the look of the crema alone starts you salivating. This is the essence of coffee – and coffee is the essence of Starbucks – isn’t it? Or have I got it wrong here?
Maybe it was a bad day. Maybe it was a “bad batch” of coffee. Maybe the barista accidentally put espresso machine cleaner into the water.
I smiled sweetly. I was pleasant as I ordered. I tried so very hard to leave all my bias and prejudice at the door… but I didn’t deserve this.
This was the worst espresso shot I’ve tasted. It was foul. Like a bitter poison. Okay. So now I know why people order over-sized sweetened lattes: it completely disguises that awful espresso.
So it was one outlet on one day.
However when you market yourself as the best coffee vendor on the entire planet – that sets up an expectation of reasonably good coffee – yeah? And you happen to get pompous coffee snobs like me walking through door hoping for something good.
Why pick on Starbucks? ‘Coz it’s fun. It’s the same reason people pick on McDonald’s food. The larger the corporation gets the less personal it becomes.
Starbucks are trying to reinvent themselves. One piece of advice: start at the basics – pull a good shot of espresso. Worry about the venti soy hazelnut vanilla cinnamon white mocha later. And the food and the music. If starbucks is to become hip and cool again – then maybe it has to start distancing itself from the ridiculous over-sized sugar-milk concoctions and start focusing on coffee purism.
But then maybe I’m just so over-caffeinated and out of touch that I have no idea what I’m talking about.
UPDATE: I’ve received a bit of insight into this. I would love to know if these rumors are true. Apparently most/all of Starbucks coffee beans are roasted in just two large facilities in the US. For some of those countries that are a substantial distance from the US – that means we have roasted beans sitting for a long time during transit.
Given that Starbucks roast their beans for a long time – this may explain something about the flavor. A longer roast means more oils start coming out of the bean subsequent to roasting. Oils sitting for a long time tend to go rancid – thus that awful espresso I had.
Can anyone confirm that Starbucks do indeed roast beans at only a few facilities? Most decent coffee comes from beans that have been roasted only days earlier.
26 Comments
Huzzah. You know Fiend, it gets my goat a bit when people simply pile hate on business for no other reasons than a misinformed distaste for business in general. You know, our ability to procure and have, say, a truly delicious Huehuetenango (light roasted please!), properly prepared is in part due to our national affluence (made possible by the fact that our business is so successful–unhip as that may seem). Coffee, after all, is a luxury item and really good coffee even more so.
So I say, let Starbucks do its thing, and if it does it well, then it deserves to be successful. Especially since it seems to be that Starbucks success isn’t coming from dirty tactics, like driving down the price of wholesalers due to buying power or keeping employees on the breadline due to low compensation (both tactics of, say, Walmart). I must confess that after posting, I decided to buy a few shares of Starbucks (I’m hoping that my logic proves true in the future), so I can’t claim no affiliation any longer, but only a very small amount.
Well said, Jaime. You are the voice of reason.
Just on the whole “hipster/cool” vibe that Starbucks is trying to reclaim: I’ve never found in works in the US or in sites built specifically for ‘Bucks. But over here (Edinburgh, Scotland) most of them a in old banks and converted offices which were built in the 1800s (Haymarket area) or older (up on the Royal Mile, medieval 6-storey buildings) which seems to work. Beanscene is a much worse culprit for fake hipster-hood. And worse coffee.
On the coffee side: I do a lot of traveling and so does my friend so we appreciate that there’s a supplier of caffeinated delight that is seriously consistent through the US, UK, Ireland and mainland Europe. Might not be fantastic quality, but after a 18 hour haul, it’s one less thing to worry about.
I will however be asking about the beans next time I can afford to go in. Or I could pop into the one beneath us right now, I suppose. (^.^) Ah, well placed flat.
I heard Starbucks doesn’t even pull their own shots?
Meaning, their espresso machine…is like one found in an old airport terminal espresso vending machine…
Is this true? Madness.
You coffee types make me sick. Coffee is coffee. Drink it and shut up. Ohhhh my shot of espresso wasn’t perfect. If I were there I would have thrown it in your face and pissed on you to cool the burn. Pretentious douchebags – all of you lot.
@Jaime – that is the comment of the week. Excellent. Enjoyed reading the references you provided. Much to think about there.