Rockstar Punched Guava is a juice and energy drink hybrid. See our review for more information regarding this version of Rockstar.

Readers, I am humbled. My search is over, my life is complete, angels are singing out in chorus.

I have found salvation, an oasis of productivity, in the best energy drink to ever hit the market: Rockstar Punched Guava.

I always kind of knew Rockstar would be the one to make the breakthrough, I just didn’t know when. The time is now, and I am thrilled. This is the newest drink in the Rockstar Punched line-up as far as I can tell and is not to be confused with Rockstar Juiced Guava.

I have numerous other reviews I’ve been piecing together over the past week, but at the first sip of this drink I’ve committed my focus to spreading the good word. No-thing-com-pares. This is the stuff caffeine addictions are made of.

Taste

Marvelous, aggressive, and kindhearted with a forgiving personality. Carbonation is perfect, the guava flavoring is not intrusive and it never gets old. Each sip, an influx of taste euphoria; each swallow, a conditioned reward for the next sip to come. This drink can be mixed with just about anything too, ranging from 7-up to Bacardi. When you first get into bed with this drink, do not hold back. Just be yourself and go all out, you will be welcomed into open arms.

Ingredients

Rockstar blends the best of both worlds. It does not depart from the wealth of natural energy ingredients so commonly found out there in energy drinks (ginkgo biloba, ginseng, milk thistle extract). At the same time, Rockstar acknowledges the fact that not one of these ingredients have been scientifically shown to do much of anything for you, so they hit it where it counts.

There is an incredibly thoughtful 120mg of caffeine per serving, and um… ya, hi – there’s 2.75 servings per bottle. No, that’s not 122.75mg of caffeine per bottle. The theory of multiplication would have it that this drink contains 330mg of caffeine, not to mention the ~68mg of guarana and B-vitamin content (!). Yes, that’s more than even most energy drink lovers would care to down in one sitting, But guess what, this drink comes in a bottle. Drink some now, some later! The angelic chorus grows louder…

Energy

My information processing bandwidth was just upgraded from 56K to T1. My thinking engine from an economic inline-4 to a twin turbocharged V12. The electrical conductors of my brain upgraded from nickel to gold and I’m only half-way through. My productivity has skyrocketed. I’ve basically written this entire review in about 25 minutes, no joke. After waiting a few hours, I’m happy to report I experienced no crash.

Verdict

Let me add I bought this drink for $1.99. It’s just too good to be true. I feel like God kills a kitten every time I drink one. Energy drink lovers, your search is over.

Reviewed by Dusty Smith

Editor's Note: Dusty was not paid by Rockstar to write this review......I swear by my mother's caffeinated teet!